Break My Fall
by Firedance Productions
Summary: Roxas attempts suicide.But he's caught.When he slips,he survives drowning and is sent to the asylum.There he meets the rest of Org. 13.He even meets Axel.An unlikely friendship sparks.T because I'm paranoid.
1. It Begins

I was standing by the edge of a pool. The deep end. The water was smooth as glass; I could see my pale reflection in it. I had a video camera in one hand, a cinderblock with some cloth tied to it, the cloth tied to my foot, and pills to dull the pain. If there was any. I sighed, and pushed my golden hair out of my face. If anyone would hate me, then its better that I was gone. Having to wonder whether I'd go crazy by the age of twenty, wishing Hayner and Olette would get along better, and that maybe the weird dreams would go away and I could live life normally.

I had swallowed almost too many pain pills. My stomach was a totally upset. Even as I wandered around for a bit, thinking, I'd rush to the toilet and throw up what little food was in my stomach. After it was finally empty, the nausea settled down and I could continue with my plan.

I went over and set the camera up about five feet away from me. I pressed 'RECORD' and started talking. "Hi Mom, Dad, I want to say I love you. Hayner, I want you all to know that you're my best friend. The best I could ever have. You've taught me a lot, and I'm so glad. I want you to know I care so much for you. Thank you for being great to me. But every else didn't believe I should still be here so…..I'll say good-bye. You're all the best. I'll see you all in the afterlife." I waved then reached forward and turned it off.

Suddenly, Hayner and Pence walked in, they were also carrying blocks. I blinked. Hayner dropped his block and it cracked down the middle. "What the hell-" Hayner said.

"What are you doing here?" Pence said.

"What does it look like, dickhead!" I shouted back, "I should ask you the same question!"

Both of them looked ashamed. "Well Roxas, we should have told you…," Pence started.

"We're gay." Hayner said blandly.

I started trembling. "You-You two?" I asked, pointing a shaking finger at them.

"Not with each other!" Pence said. "I'm for…..well...errr…..Seifer." He mumbled and I struggled not to fall on my ass.

"Hayner...?" I asked, turning to him.

"For...you." Hayner said, rubbing his arm.

As my knees gave way, they hit the cinder block and it slipped into the water. With the realization of my complete stupidity, it tugs on my ankle. Then drags me straight to the water. "ROXAS!" Hayner screamed.

I yell with pain and try to grab the pool side. My fingers latch on, and then I realize it's wet.

The fingers almost immediately slip.

With a cry, I am plunged under the surface. I sink, floundering helplessly, straight to the bottom, the block hitting the pool bottom with a muted thump.

Trapped.

Through tears and stinging chlorine, I struggle against the cloth tied to my foot. In the water I can't see straight and my fingers scrabble uselessly against the bond. My nails quickly become torn up. The jagged parts slice clean through my skin.

By the time I realize I'd been screaming my head off underwater, I'm out of air.

Black spots appear on my vision.

I look up to see Hayner's terrified face staring at me as he dives in after me.

My hand half floats half extends towards him.

Hayner grabs my wrist and tries to tug me upwards.

Small streams of bubbles escape from my mouth when I try to cry out from the yanking on my ankle.

The black spots were growing bigger as Hayner swam down and began to untie the noose.

By the time he'd gotten it undone, I had felt myself beginning to float away.

My spirit rising from my body to fly upwards as he dragged me to the surface. I hoped to finally leave. I floated upwards, toward a bright light and...

To what I hoped was heaven!


	2. Arrival and a Familiar Face

I remember flashing lights, voices. I couldn't move, my chest was constricting, everything was closing in around me. I felt dizzy. I wanted to run and run until I actually died. My chest and throat were behind compressed, tighter…..tighter. I can't breathe! I can't breathe! I can't breathe! Why won't anyone stop it? I was gasping and nothing was coming into my lungs! You stupid mother fuckers around me lift a finger and freaking help me! I can't breathe!

Suddenly everything froze…..

And I woke up.

I was in a padded room.

_Shit._

That's just great. Then I noticed I was screaming at the top of my lungs. Also that my throat was burning like hell. When I noticed both of these factors, I stopped screaming. I lay there, panting and tried to push myself up. I lifted up then flopped down. My arms were completely bound. "Oh that's just great. _Fucking_ great!" I hissed.

I coughed as I struggled to sit up. For some reason, my lips were too dry and they split open, causing blood to run down my chin and onto the coat I was wearing. I made a hissing noise and coughed. Managing to stand up, I stumbled across the room and almost fell into the door. I began making the hissing/coughing noised again. Then the door opened and it threw me backwards, back onto the ground. There was a very girly giggle. "Well, now that you've calmed down, we can take you to your room!"

Oh _SHIT!_

It's one of those super happy crazy annoying chicks that act like nothing's wrong! She grabbed my upper right arm with one hand, and injected me with something. I made a growling noise and began coughing from my dry throat. The women pulled me, struggling, up from the ground, and led me into the hallway.

I made the hissing/coughing sound and more blood pumped from my lips. "Ah, ah, ah!" She said, waggling a finger. "That won't do! Do you want to turn around and go back inside the _Fun Room_?"

I twitched and attempted to flee. Her gripped suddenly tightened like a constricting cobra. I yelped in pain as I felt her too-long nails bite into my flesh. "Now, now, are you really going to under-estimate me?" She said in a very dangerous voice.

I froze and allowed her to steer me down the hallway to a room. Everything, EVERYTHING, was white. _Fucking_ white! I already felt like I wanted to pull my arms free, whip around, and tear open that stupid women's throat. Splattering some blood across the walls would be a nice break from the stupid white!

The next weeks passed over in a blur. The woman that had escorted me to the room was Aerith. She wore a long pink dress and wears her hair in a long brown ponytail. She had a soft voice. She had laid me down on the bed in the room, removed the coat then, in a flash, had me bounded on the bed. I struggled, screaming again. Then she said, "Hayner came to visit." And I shut up to listen to what happened in that padded room while I was too doped up to tell the difference between a watermelon and grape.

I had come to the asylum about a month ago. Hayner had come to visit, but I'd been so drugged I was higher than a kite! Apparently, I'd thrown myself screaming bloody murder at the door. Shouting that it was his fault I was here, that he should be standing next to me, not standing there trying to look sorry!

Well, I hoped he does come back to visit.

After she left, I struggled around a bit, then figured out how to undo the bonds. My lips were bleeding and lying down on my back wasn't help in the least! I sat up and rubbed my face. This wasn't exactly going how I wanted it to. I really wanted to go friggin' up! Not down in hell! God, this shit is worse than I thought!

Mumbling to myself and got up and looked around my room. There was a punching bag in the corner. I immediately ran to it and began pounding on it as hard as I could. Soon after that, I got bored and moved to the desk that was set up. Everything was rounded off, smooth and padded. I grabbed a pencil, paper, and began drawing.

I drew what I could remember of my little sister, Namine,'s face. I drew the contours of her face, the medium-length blonde hair over her shoulder, adding a pretty little ribbon to her hair and drew the shoulder straps of her dress.

Soon, I was lining up more paper and added the rest of her. I drew her sitting on her favorite chair. I added the hem of her dress, the sandals she always wore. I drew the sketchbook she always carried. She loved to draw pictures of me and my brother. _Sora_. We were the closest family ever. We loved each other so much we could tell them anything.

But then the news; Namine had cancer, Sora did too. And out father was being carted off to war. I spent the next week sobbing my eyes out with Sora and Namine. We hugged like no tomorrow.

Sora had wrist cancer in both arms, and they couldn't cure it. Namine had cancer in both her legs with the odds stacked high against her.

The three of us and our mom had cried for each other in our mom's bed. She held all of us like we were two, sobbing even as she would stroke our hair. We would sleep there; we didn't want to part even for a little bit.

Soon, I was helping Sora and Namine around the house. Sora soon couldn't open anything without help, his wrists hurt so much. He was constantly in the hospital for surgery. Namine's legs were in such pain when she walked that she was forced to use a wheelchair. She hated it, even though she seemed like a girly-girl, I could never beat her in a race.

I looked down at the drawing and found that there were clear and red droplets on the picture. I hastily wiped them up with a corner of the blanket on the bed. With a sigh, I picked up some colored pencils and added as much color detail as I could. Then I grabbed some tape that was on the desk, attached the papers together, and hung them on the wall. I stood back and admired the work. It was almost as if Namine was saying, _I'm still with you_.

I smiled at the picture, then grabbed another paper and drew Sora. I added his messy spiked brown hair, the jacket, and gloves. His red jumpsuit stood out against the white walls. I noticed that the red looked like blood. Then the picture seemed to say, _It's red like the sun you dope! Not blood, that's just sick!_

I began mumbling to myself. "They think I'm crazy, I'm not crazy! They just need an excuse to lock me up! I don't need that. I'm perfectly normal, just some minor cons! I've got more pros than cons!"

The next week went on like this, I was constantly muttering to myself. Plans of escape, or just to speak of something. Sometimes, I talk about Namine and Sora. I'd end up lying on my bed heaving and out of breath from shrieking and crying.

They didn't like that, and soon began drugging me if I would start crying. I soon learned to keep my emotions under control. I felt better after the drugs finally got out of my system. I felt more awake and aware.

Well, soon after this I was aloud more freedom. Instead of my food being pushed through a slot onto a table, someone would hand it to me or walk in and set it on the table. I liked this, I was glad to see that there were humans in this place. The person that served my food was Riku. He never told me his last name. He was a nice guy, almost eighteen. He didn't say a lot, but I liked having someone to talk to, even if they didn't say a lot back.

I leaned against my door. "It must suck to be working here." I said to him.

"Hnn," Was the reply.

"You have any siblings?" I asked through the door.

"…None." He said.

"I had a younger sister and an older twin brother." I said.

"Past-tense?" Riku asked.

"Yeah," I said. "Namine and Sora had cancer…so they both died."

I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I guess he walked away, because I didn't hear a reply. I heard footsteps. Then…..

"You knew Sora?" His voice was closer, it sounded like he was leaning against the door.

"Yeah, he's my older twin by a few minutes." I replied.

I sat up straighter, memories that were probably suppressed by force and by accident when I'd became depressed beyond belief! _Riku!_ He and Sora had been in love! I remember now, Sora and Riku loved each other so much. "I thought…I thought…..he'd left me…on purpose." Riku's voice sounded shaky.

"No." I said straight-out. "Sora loved you too much to have left you on his own."

"…"

"I miss him too." I said, then got up and moved to the bed.

I curled up, thinking. _I can't believe it! My guard in this hell-hole is someone I know! What are the god-damn odds?_


	3. Roommate

**I hope this chapter's good. Sorry that it took so long to get out. I've been busy.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

When I woke up the next day, a small square of sunlight was against the door. I got up and walked across the room, placing my hand in it. It was warm. My hand fell from it and hung limp. I sighed and walked over to the pictures that hung over the wall by my bed. I tapped Sora's picture, making it flutter a bit. I did the same with Namine's. I took a step back and watched them.

Namine's picture waved at me, her smile widening a bit. Sora closed his eyes as his grin widened even more, tipping his head to one side. The picture of Olette waved to me as well. Pence laughed good-naturedly. Hayner simply grinned, showing a thumbs-up. I'd already forgiven him, it wasn't his fault...I suppose...?

As I thought that, Hayner's smile drooped and he looked at me in disbelief and shock. _'You think I really __wanted __you here?'_

I chuckled at him. His smile returned and Olette laughed. Her hand seemed to reach out of the picture to wave at Sora and Namine. They both waved back, exchanging words I couldn't hear.

I smiled at them all, chatting away in their frames, and then jumped two feet in the air when the door opened. Riku walked in. "You're getting a new room." He said.

I blinked. "Really? So soon?"

"Yeah, and a roommate. Heard about that one guy with the spiked red hair?"

"That pyromaniac?" I cried.

I'd heard about this guy before.

Creep.

"Guess so." Riku replied. "Take what you want."

I turned and pulled the pictures from the wall. "Follow me, then." He said and turned, walking out of the room.

I froze. "Um….out in the hallway?" I asked.

"How else are you going to get to your room? Teleporting?" Riku demanded, looking at me.

I sighed, and shuffled along after him. The ankle that had been tied to the noose attached to the cinder-block hurt like hell. I limped along after him as he led me down the hallway. I glanced in some windows, seeing many other people. There was a girl with scarlet-ish hair that was tied down on the bed like I'd been a couple months before. I hastily looked away as her head slowly turned towards me.

Even if she couldn't see me through the glass.

It felt like she could see me.

I followed as close as I could behind Riku, limping along.

* * *

We came to a door, and Riku unlocked it with a swipe of his card. When we walked in, I noticed that the coloring in here was different. There were two desks, both white, and bunk beds on the left wall. The room was also a bit warmer than the rest of the building, which is almost freezing all the time, and I felt a bit better in here. "You get the top bunk." Riku said.

"Okay." I mumbled, climbing the ladder and tacking my pictures up on the wall next to my bed.

They all looked around the room, then gave me thumbs-ups that they approved of the relocation. I let a small smile form on my lips.

"You gonna be alright here? I heard that your room-mate is almost off the deep-end." Riku concerned with me.

"I think I'll be alright." I reply, not looking at him.

"He'll probably come in later so don't get too comfortable with just you here." Riku said, then walked out.

I sighed, and laid back on my bed, hands behind my head, watching the pictures I'd hung up chatting to each other. I sighed again, and closed my eyes.

"Roxas!" A female voice said.

I sat bolt upright, thankfully the ceiling was really high or I would've cracked my head on it, looking around. The room was empty. I blinked then lay back down. I waited a moment, then closed my eyes again. "Roxas! Don't go to sleep!"

I sat up again, the voice sounded a bit like... "Olette?" I whispered, looking around the deserted room again.

"Behind you!" I heard a guy's voice.

I whipped my head around to see my picture of Olette waving her hands at me, Sora was imitating her. "Sora, Olette, what-" I began but was shushed by the picture of Namine.

She'd stood up from her chair and had moved forward until only her head and shoulders were seen. "Roxas, stay calm okay?" She said rather quickly. "A- I mean- Your roommate will be here soon. We never wanted to leave you Roxas. None of us."

"What do you mean none- wait- does that mean-?" I started, my eyes widening.

I got up onto my knees and moved closer to them. "Roxas, listen closely!" Olette cut in. "We're able to speak to you through these portraits that you drew of us! You'll find a ring, and a necklace. When you put them on, you'll be able to talk to us!"

Pence continued for her. "When you wear them, you'll be able to see us as well. Roxas...technically...we're all gone. But we couldn't leave you. So this is what we can do. We just...oh, Roxas."

I felt sick.

"Roxas, what ever you do. You must not tell anyone that you can see us. You'll get the ring and necklace taken away for good!" Hayner spoke up.

"Please," I looked over at the picture of Sora. He seemed to have his hands pressed against some invisible glass that divided me from him. I quickly shuffled closer to his picture, shaking, and pressed by hands against the tiny picture as Sora looked straight into my eyes. "Roxas, you can't let that happen! You won't! I believe in you! We all do..."

Tears were sparkling in all of their eyes.

I felt like I was going to puke.

I slapped a hand to my mouth, my other arm wrapping around my stomach, as I retched.

This was insane!

How were pictures talking to me?

What the hell?

What the fucking hell!

I scrambled backwards. The tears from the others' eyes were flowing from the pictures towards me. "No, no, no, no, no, no, no," I mumbled from between my fingers, retching again.

The tears seemed to become silver ribbons, wrapping around my arms and tying them behind my back. The strands connected me to the pictures. "No!" I yelped, struggling in vain to free myself from the bonds I felt tightening around my arms.

I moved farther backwards. Suddenly, everyone in the pictures threw out their hands towards me. "Roxas!" They all cried, ringing loud and clear in my ears.

I felt myself slip backwards off the bed, and fall head-first with a crash onto the ground.

Everything went dark.

* * *

**I dunno where that came from but I thought it was pretty darn good! I think I have the next chappie lined up. Well...about half of it, anyway. I was gonna have that half in this chapter, but this cliffhanger felt better.**

**Hope you like it!**

**(Still don't own KH)**

**[I just remembered XC]  
**


	4. Nightmares

_I sat in my dorm bathroom; Axel was out at some party. He'd invited me, but I'd turned him down. He seemed a bit disappointed but..._

_I didn't want to wait any longer._

_I couldn't. _

_Shaking, I click the recorder on. I move back to the sink and sit down, my legs won't support me. "Hi...everyone. If you find this, that probably means I'm...dead," My voice cracks harshly. Taking a deep breath, I continue in a pained voice. "I'm sorry...for all the trouble I caused you. Axel, we've known each other for two years. I lo-...and I know-...I'll miss you so much. Y-You've been...great t-to...me. Mom and dad, you can move on with Sora…..he's always been the better child. I've always dragged you down with bad grades and...issues."_

_I pause, tears are splashing down my face. My whole body heaves with sobs as I remember what had happened. In first grade, I'd stabbed classmate with knife that I'd hidden in my backpack. The classmate got a huge slice down his forearm. I later learned that I was Schizophrenic. I had to take medicine each and everyday more than once a day so that it didn't affect or help me. "I-I hope y-y-y…..you don't…..m-mourn me….t-too much! G-…Good-bye," I choke out._

_I set the recorder down, unaware that I've left it on. I pick up the heavy steak knife, more like a mini machete, and hold it to my throat. _Not that way_._ _A voice whispers in my mind. _Windows have more than one use.

_I lower the knife. Maybe having a shitty dorm on the top floor was good. I unconsciously pick up the recorder and move to the large windows. I throw them open and breath in the night air. "This is it." I say to no one, gripping the sill so that I wouldn't fall over, I'm shaking so hard._

_I clamber up and hold one of the open window panes. Still gripping the steak knife, I slide it onto my wrist and pull up._ Slowly. _Letting the blood drip onto anyone who was out there. It was raining, thankfully. Taking the knife into the other hand, I do the same to the opposite wrist. My vision grows hazy and I feel myself swaying. "Heh," I mutter, still not knowing the recorder was on, should have paid more attention._

_In my minds eye, I watch as memories of my life fly down and began to create wings on my back. Large glass wings of every moment of my life. I watched as the moment when Sora had won an award as school, while I was told to leave the convocation for something I didn't do. In my mind, I reach up and snatched that memory out of the air._

_I crushed it into dust with my fingers, then released the fragments and watch them float away._

_Mustering the last strength I could before my legs gave way, I lean forward. My wings begin to flap and I feel myself beginning to fly upwards. My feet slip from the wet sill. Looking up, I see the moon through a patch in the sky. Everything felt like slow motion._ I'm sorry… _I thought, extending a hand upwards towards it._ I'm so sorry…..that I existed.

_I give a loud gasp and everything was in reality again._

_I fell._

_My wings shatter and faded away._

_I heard people yelling._

_One voice I could make out through the rush._

_"Roxas!"_

...Axel?

_Feel my back hit the pavement._

_Followed by my head._

_A brief flash of pain shooting through my body._

_Pure Agony!_

_Then..._

I scream.


End file.
